Drowning… 

There is this image of a swimsuit model coming out of an infinity pool, looking gorgeous! Just gorgeous! Her makeup so intact, you’d end up buying it rather than the swimsuit. So let me lol and change the canvas here. 

Sorry, am not in an infinity pool, I don’t gat any fancy swimwear, am not wearing any makeup and trust me, please trust me, when I tell you, it feels like am drowning. 

Am drowning in pride, am so self absorbed, and it’s got it’s weight on me. Am drowning in self actualisation, they have this fancy name I picked up called re-branding. Am drowning in my accolades, in my suits, in my scents, drowning in power and praise. Drowning in self righteousness. Drowning in planks and weights.  Drowning in my lifestyle, drowning deep down in my opinions. Help. Am drowning in everything fleeting. 

King Solomon termed his drown a vanity.  I feel him. Remember this guy had like everything! Literary everything, I don’t even have a third of his world and am drowning. 

Am drowning pretty. Drowning behind the IMac, iPhone something, looking pretty. Drowning in my Paco robannes and trending fashions. Drowning pretty. Drowning in business class. You See me and I give you visions of your future success. Drowning pretty. 

I drown and am aware of it. Am aware of my drowning because, am now gasping for air. There is contention in these deep waters. I gasp because I want to live again.  I want up and out. I want to come out of an infinity pool like a swimsuit model with a Bible in my hand… ROFL. On a very serious note, I want to come up for air. Come out of these lifeless waters of vanity

I want to know rest, know peace, know life,  know grace. I cannot drown another day. I can’t be always busy, drowning. Cmon! Nah!

Come up for air with me, let’s go to the feet of Jesus and dump on him. Let’s just drop masks, the veils and the superhero costumes. Let’s throw the babies and the bath waters,  let’s stop not save any nines, let’s empty the half full glasses. Let’s, be late and never, let us not wait for the fat lady to sing. Drop your mics, park the jaguars, get a room, shut it and in there, talk to God. Do this fervently and consistently Jesus style. 

It’s then you will save other drowning lives. 

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A Namaan experience

The day is August 12th, the year is 2014. It’s 9am and I had just reached my office and that’s the time these red tiny hives began their raid on me. I can tell you that with every minute that passed, about 6 popped and by 11am, I was on my way out of the office with a scarf all over my face scared to pieces, what I mean is, freaked out to pieces. 

The previous day, all I had was a night fever and a tiny rash on my back and nothing more. The intern doctor couldn’t find anything and he recommended a HIV test! I just thought he was freaking mad like the rash! He prescribed fungal infection pills and sent me home. Here I was the following morning raided and it’s now noon and if you had  looked at my face, you could run and never look back. Even my husband took away all the mirrors from me. 

What I didn’t know is that from the top of my head to my toes, I had red hive like rashes and when I hit the hospital they put me on an immediate anti inflammatory drug to slow down whatever it was. They thought it was an allergy of some sort but my response to them is all I ate was never new…. And with meds in and on me I was home, anxious, sad, scared but was having the longest chat with God in my very core. Can you imagine how ugly I looked that my daughter was not allowed to see me! I was hideous and now in so much pain all over my body 

The shower I took on that night was the most painful and full of anguish. My entire body was full of a mad red rash that was now popping and irritable. The liquid they gave me to apply was ashy and white and I looked even more hideous! 

Here is what, for the next 5 days I couldt leave my room. I clung on hope evertime I saw a rash dry up, remember I had thousands all over me. I lost my entire epidermis: I flaked, molted and everywhere I sat, I left skin evidence 

All this time my faith was built up for healing because the diagnosis classified this In the family of eczema and incurable. Psoriasis they called it. That built my faith even the more. “Is there anything hard for God”(Mathew 19:26). I kept my faith up and always on. I had lost my entire pigment and looked burnt. My wardrobe changed. For weeks I longed to wear sleevelesses as it was summer…my faith grew even the more 

Everyday I saw change. A few months on, you could see dark patches all over me and this incurable had it’s evidence on me. So that one Sunday morning, Jesus completely healed my disease. I lifted my hands in faith and saw myself wear a sleeveless and I smiled. It then happened.

I was completely healed. I had lost most of my hair due to the medications and shampoos. But listen to my testimony :

I am completely healed today, which I now realize it’s exactly 3 years ago! I have not seen a skin specialist in all this time. Am not on any meds, my skin is even younger than it was when I was In my 20’s, I got a totally new skin!  It’s like Namaans I guess🙌 and I didn’t dip in any river. Just drowned in faith, that’s all.  My hair?  I have never had hair this good since I was born! 

  • I know that I know that I know, the healing power of Jesus was so costly it’s got to be free and I am a beneficiary ! I know that incurable is a worldly term that I refused to conform to. I am healed and even in this affliction, God will forever be glorified. 

Yours, Drowning in faith, 

Kanyeria